How to Buy Shoes for Your Wife — A husband's guide to getting it right

Let’s be frank, buying shoes and clothes for your wife is something that fills most blokes with dread. At least the first few times. The good news? It gets easier. That’s not to say you won’t foul it up a decade in – but that’s part of being in a relationship.

A great first tip is to get on this train early. Once you’ve bought that first pair of black ballet flats or white leather trainers and the endorphins are flowing, it becomes second nature. Without planning and thought, it can go brilliantly... or it can go... well, not so brilliantly.

Let’s see if I can help. You might be buying for a birthday, an anniversary, or Christmas. Ideally, I’d start this buying journey just because you care - or because you know you’ve done something wrong, even if you’re not sure what yet.

I’ve written this guide in steps (pun very much intended), as someone who has experienced buying women’s shoes for my other, and far better, half. If you think I’m missing anything - like always throwing in a pedicure - let me know in the comments. I’ve bought all sorts of gifts in the past, but most of my shoe experience has been with brands like Cocorose London  - so forgive the bias. It’s very relatable and transferable.

Step 1: Accept That This Matters - Shoes Make Us Feel Good

Shoes matter. Not in a casual, "oh those are nice" way. In a "these complete the outfit and define how I feel all day" kind of way.

Your wife’s shoes are part of her identity. Just like what you wear reflects who you are. They’re an extension of how she walks through life—literally and figuratively. Get this right, and you’re not just buying her something nice. You’re buying her a little bit of joy, confidence, and comfort all wrapped up in a lovely box.

Get it wrong? It goes in that pile. The one she never wears but can’t quite throw away. That’s why I suggest, if you can, start safe - black leather flats, white leather trainers - wardrobe necessities. Always one of the 33 in the 333 fashion styling method.

Step 2: Know Your Wife’s Shoe Size

This is actually pretty easy. Do not guess. Most certainly, do not guess. My tip: write down all her sizes in a note on your phone, including brands and types of shoes. Keep it updated, because sizes change. Feet often get wider with age.

Your best bet is to sneak a look at her current favourites. Note the brand, the style if possible (Shoreditch, Sandringham, Samba), and check the size on the inside label - under the tongue, outsole, or lining. Look for UK sizing (4, 5, 6) and EU sizing (37, 38, 39).

Every brand fits a little differently because they use different lasts. Cocorose shoes are known for comfort and true-to-fit sizing, but some styles (like the Hoxton Leather Trainers) have a bit more room for natural foot movement.

If in doubt, go with the size she wears in trainers or flats. I’ll repeat this - make sure there’s a good exchange policy. If you’re buying online, go with a UK-based business. Much easier to return or exchange. You want more than 14 days and ideally free, no-quibble returns. Cocorose London, for example, offers a fair policy - 30 days, free returns and exchanges in the UK.

Step 3: Choose the Right Style

Not all shoes are created equal. And not all styles suit every woman. For your first few purchases, take inspiration from the closet. What does your wife like to wear? These are my go-to styles:

Ballet Flats (Including Black Leather)

Effortless and elegant. They lost some love from 2014 to 2024 during the trainer takeover, but ballet flats are still incredibly useful and versatile. I know fashion mags talk about "wardrobe staples" - but every woman should have at least one decent pair of black leather ballet flats. For inspiration, look at the Harrow or the Piccadilly styles from Cocorose London. Perfect for school runs or dinner at the Giggling Squid. For purchase number one, this could be your golden ticket. Janan Leo wrote a great guide, read how to choose the best ballet flats guide here.

Leather Trainers

Stick with leather, although some vegan options are brilliant too. Trainers are stylish, supportive, and perfect for busy women. Over the last 10 years, they’ve gone from casual wear to everyday essentials - even in boardrooms. Pick a brand your wife knows, or one with a similar feel. Cocorose London trainers are a solid choice - fun yet refined, lined with leather, pillow-soft cushioning, and comfy insoles.

Women’s Leather Flats (Loafers or Mary Janes)

More structured than ballet flats, but just as chic. Loafers can be tricky to fit if they’re stiff. Driving shoes - like Tod’s-style in suede or Cocorose’s Clapham loafers in woven leather - are flexible, soft, and stylish.

Summer Sandals

Don’t default to flip-flops. Try a slide or something like the Hermes-inspired Dune sandals - still going strong. Artisan styles like Lainback London work too. Avoid toe-posts unless you know she loves them - they take breaking in. And yes, budget for a nail bar trip too.

Boots?

Start with ankle boots. Leave the calf-length styles for later - you need to consider calf width. This isn’t like buying wellies. I speak from experience.

Step 4: Don’t Go Flashy Unless You’re Very, Very Sure

Gentlemen, this is not the time to make bold fashion statements on her behalf. Not until your confidence is sky high.
Most wives are going to be serious impressed and bowled over if you buy them a towering pair of heels as a surprise gift - because as I have said, these can be the most difficult to get right with the fit. You don’t want the look of joy to slip into the expression of “oh well, thanks for trying … err .. they are lovely though”. So I don’t think I’m lacking ambition when I recommend, to generally avoid heels. Again, unless you’re replacing an identical pair your wife to a point of no return.
Think timeless. Think wearable. Think "she’ll actually wear these more than once."

Step 5: Packaging Matters More Than You Think

Packaging is part of the experience. Remember how iPhones used to come in perfectly designed boxes with everything tucked in? Same idea.

Yes, the shoes matter most - but the box, the tissue wrap, even a ribbon... it all adds to the magic. There’s an entire internet rabbit hole of unboxing videos. If a lovely box is the opening act to a perfect pair of shoes, you’ve nailed it.

Am I overstepping if I suggest a note? Something like: “I saw these and thought of you. I hope they make your feet as happy as you make me.”

It’s a personal gift. A note shows thoughtfulness—and helps if you’ve got the colour just slightly off!

Step 6: Buy Early (Not the Night Before)

Give yourself time. Planning ahead gives you time to:

• Order the correct size
• Avoid express delivery fee
• Have a back up plan if needed .. but I am sure you will not.
  

It's a step that is very self-explanatory, this guide is about getting the shoe purchase for your wife right first time, but just give yourself a few extra days early.

Step 7: Comfort Is King

Step seven to heaven, I don’t know why I have left this to step seven – it’s really important. At the top of this guide, I took the time to focus on how shoes make us feel, well if they make your wife feel a million dollars for a hour and then she can’t wait to slip into a pair of trusted flats, all you have tried to achieve has failed.

If you can match style with comfort the shoes you chose for your wife will get paired with so many outfits. She will remember how these shoes feel, long after the box is recycled.

Comfort and style are core values for a brand like Cocorose London, read the reviews. Every Cocorose London shoe is designed for wear-all-day comfort. We’re talking cushioned insoles, flexible soles, and designs that are podiatrist-happy without sacrificing style.

Step 8: Still Unsure? Go with a Bestseller

When in doubt, trust what works - either from her own wardrobe or from customer favourites.

Some Cocorose London bestsellers:

• Hoxton White Trainers with Red Hearts
• Harrow black ballet flat with black patent toe cap
• Clapham woven leather loafer in tan

Final Thoughts from Mr Hubbard

Mr Hubbard is me - the shoemaker’s husband. A pen name for my blogs and ramblings.

Buying shoes for your wife doesn’t need to be a minefield. It can be one of the most thoughtful gifts you’ll ever give.

If you take anything away, let it be this:

• Get the size right
• Choose comfort and style
• Avoid the bling, unless shoe loves the bling
• Use your partner's existing shoes and customer reviews as your guide
• If you have the brand, style and colour / design sorted - focus on the packaging

• Write a personal note - it will accentuate the packaging, or make up for it.

As I was writing this, I got to thinking of another great idea to complement the amazing ballet flats or trainers that you have purchased for your wife. Perhaps find an old pair of heels she loved and see if a local cobbler (there are still some around) could breathe life back into them. Present these first, prepare the ground, then present pièce de resistance … endorphins will be flying.

FAQs: Shoe-Gifting for Husbands by Cocorose London

Q: What are the safest styles to buy if I don’t know her taste well?
A: Women’s Leather Trainers or Black Leather Ballet Flats—classic, wearable, and appreciated by almost everyone.

Q: What if I get the size wrong?
A: Try to check first, but Cocorose offers easy returns and exchanges. Just keep the packaging.

Q: What’s the best colour for first-time shoe gifts?
A: Neutral tones—black, nude, or navy. Black leather ballet flats go with everything.

Q: Are Cocorose shoes good quality?
A: Absolutely. Premium materials, comfort-first design, and handcrafted details.

Q: When should I gift shoes?
A: Birthdays, anniversaries, or best of all—just because. A random Tuesday surprise often means the most.

Ready to Get It Right?

Buying shoes for your wife is more than a gift. It’s a gesture of thoughtfulness and care. Plan it well, look at size and materials choices, and choose a trusted brand like Cocorose London.

Explore our top picks:

• Women's Leather Trainers
• Ballet Flats
• Black Leather Ballet Flats
• Women's Leather Flats
  

Or browse Janan’s writings on the Cocorose London Blog - truly inspiring.

And if you’re still not sure... bookmark this guide. Or get her a gift card - here’s the link.

Written with love, experience, and a quiet nod of solidarity to husbands everywhere.